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Wednesday, 7 September 2011

Fuck off Alan McGee

Life's a laugh-riot when you're washed up ex-coke addict and twice-failed label proprietor like Alan McGee! Not only do you get to ruin independent music in the 90s (and prior to that drive Scottish music into a bullshit "twee" cul-de-sac) you now get to turn around and laugh in the face of the already-struggling-but-still-afloat indies distributed by PIAS who lost their stock in last month's Sony warehouse fire. Now THAT'S a result! You also get to spit in the face (while still laughing) of the younger generation by proclaiming that aspiring to be McCartney or Jagger is "boring" - even though you did more than most to instill those dreams in that generation. Double score! AND you get to spit in the face of your existing fans (you might have stopped laughing by this point but who knows?) by claiming you don't really like music! That's a hat trick!

As Neil Kulkarni so aptly pointed out earlier, McGee's dislike of music was apparent when he signed Oasis,. Yet the question still remains - what DO you like Alan? Drugs? Excitement? Wind ups? Empty hyperbole? Internet porn? Laughing at other people's expense? If the answer is "all of the above" then pat yourself on the back - you've just joined the ranks of the mainstream, popular-culture consumer of the 21st Century.

OF COURSE aspiring to be Jagger or McCartney these days is boring, when every two-bit failed busker with a fanzine and a smack-habit gets lauded to the rafters as some kind of genius, a process set in motion by McGee himself with trad-rock retro revivalists like Primal Scream and Oasis. If anything has killed the music industry and any genuine excitement that surrounds rock and roll it's not the shitty drugs, or the even shittier aspirations. No, it's the relentless hyping of mediocre crap. This is a process that McGee himself is very familiar with. Some would in fact say that Alan McGee is a master of this dark art - if you're under 27, google Three Colours Red and shudder in relief at not having lived through an era that saw McGee claiming they were the new Sex Pistols.

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